Friday, May 14, 2010

Feelin like a women

I've stated before here about not really liking referring to myself as a "women" (see the below list of things as to why). I prefer young lady or even girl. When I was younger I would hear all these ladies (women) complain about things that were going on with their bodies. I thought I must have been the luckiest girl in the world because I didn't feel half of those things. Sure I had the occasional cramps and sore boobs, but not what they were saying!!!


And now here we are. I am 30 and things are starting to be felt or even seen. I'm feeling like a women. Let me break it down for you.

  •  I feel like I am going to start my period 2 weeks or more before I am supposed to. Really?!? That is nowhere near fair!
  • The cramps.
  • The mood swings - OH, the mood swings!!!!
  • The sore and swollen boobs that make your whole body ache.
  • The normal facial hair that is now looking like a blond mustache. Thank God it isn't dark yet, but I think my waxing days are just around the corner because I can't keep up with the shaving (Just kidding, I DO NOT SHAVE my face!)
  • The nice dark lip liner I am starting to develop. I really don't know what's up with that, freckles I guess? I have no freakin clue!
  • Not being able to tan like I use to now I just get more stinkin freckles on my nice pasty body.
  • While we are on freckles, I have a nice round spot on my cheek bone of freckles. WTH! If you are going to be freckles, look like normal freckles so people don't ask you what is wrong with your face! (note to self: time to find a good foundation and switch to washing your face every night instead of every morning)
  • The crow's feet and frown laugh lines.
  • The bloating.
  • The constipation - thank goodness this one has only happened once and I have been pregnant three times.
  • My hair changing texture.
  • My body indicating to me when I am ovulating. (Why does my body seem to ovulate twice in a cycle based on this little indicator or is there something else wrong with me?)
  • My posture getting worse and worse. Stand up straight for goodness sake!
  • The cottage cheese no matter how much weight I lose in one particular part of my booty, er I mean body.
  • The pooch in my stomach no matter how much weight I lose.
  • The hard callus things on my feet.

I am sure the list could go on and on, but for right now please God, let this be all! Keep the grey hairs away for at least 10 more years pretty, pretty, pretty please!


Sorry if I grossed some of you out.

16 comments:

  1. Damn, Dale run for the hills. Run Dale Run. Your wife is shaving her face. Hahahahah.

    Had to get you back for calling me a hick!

    You all have a good weekend.

    ReplyDelete
  2. You've got a long way's to go...MA'AM! ;)

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  3. And while you are on the freckles, I made Nip do one of those magazine quizzes and on question "what feature do you find least attractive" what do you think he answered? I was so shocked I started crying! Hello, have you ever looked at me? I have freckles on my face, shoulder and yes, a C shaped blob on my left leg. Stab in the heart!

    And I have a serious case of white hairs that just spring up out of nowhere. I'm squeezing out my last few months of my 20's with that?!?

    By the way, you are gorgous so shut up.

    ReplyDelete
  4. This one cracks me up. I have those freckles around my top lip too. I thought it was melasma. Might be, it's better in the winter and seems to come out with the sun. Yeah, we all have all that other crap too. Oh, the joy...

    Have a good one.
    alicia

    ReplyDelete
  5. Hey there! I am from MBC! Things started to change for me when I was thirty, as well. But I always try to look at the positive side. The boobs hurting I can definately do without! He, he, he! You got a follower in me! Come visit me at Mama's Little Chick.

    Mama Hen
    www.mamaslittlechick.com

    ReplyDelete
  6. Love your honesty! Thanks for a good laugh!
    Big Fat Mama

    ReplyDelete
  7. Boy I fit the list to a perfectly. Stopping from Mom Loop and now following.

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  8. Good Morning, I am stopping in from Mom Loop Too! I am sure all of this started happening to me around 30 too, but I have been in denial until last year! LOL ~ you have a new follower

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  9. I concur! What the heck is happening!
    -Alessandra from Mom Loop

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  10. What a cute blog! I love the header photography. I'm over from Mom Loop.

    Stop by soon..

    http://designdiva-interiormotives.blogspot.com/
    www.drapes2my20s.com

    ReplyDelete
  11. Hilarious! I'm so glad that I'm not the only one with the freckle lip liner issue. I even have an abundance of freckles on my upper lip. It looks like a mustache or something. lol As for the gray hair...I hate you (okay, not really)! I've already got a bunch. lol Great post.
    Thanks so much for stopping by and commenting on my Friday Favorites post. Have a great day.

    Kristi, Live and Love...Out Loud
    @TweetingMama

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  12. hahahah right there with you at 32! I am now following from Mom Loop Friday follow

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  13. Stopping by from Mom Loop...your newest follower! Stop by when you have a chance....

    http://activitymom.blogspot.com

    ReplyDelete
  14. Hi! Stopping by from MBC. Great blog.

    Have a nice day!

    ReplyDelete
  15. Thanks everyone for enjoying this post! Glad you all can relate : )! Except you, Scott! I will be visiting you all soon! Have a great week and hopefully I will hear from you again soon!

    ReplyDelete

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