12 Things I Learned This Week

Things I've learned this week: 

1. I have zero motivation to do any cooking when the hubs isn't going to be home to eat it. 
2. When someone says, "Stay away from dairy" I tend to crave the crap out of it.  Someone send me some Cheese and ice cream!
3. I can still get really into a basketball game even if I know few of the players. 
4. My youngest son is going to be a tough one.  Bloody lips, premature molars, falling, bruised cheeks, red/chapped/cracking chin from all of the drool... this kid is a trooper!
5. My sister can still bring me to laughing tears and belly laughs.
6. Hand sanitizer can remove permanent marker from doors.  I have yet to verify that though.  I just trust my source.
7. The results I get from four extremely hard workouts I do Monday through Thursday seem to disappear by Sunday.
8. My oldest son knows verses of Kriss Kross' Jump Around rather well.
9. My boys have no sense of fashion - see Instagram
10. A forgotten milk covered shirt and the clothes stripped from the baby with a leaky diaper in close vicinity to one another smell cover your mouth and sprint away before you lose your dinner dreadfully awful. 
11. My middle son thinks that if he's in the bath and has to go poop, that it is ok to get out, go to the toilet and then not wipe his butt because he is just getting right back into the tub anyway. 
12. AND he also thinks that it's ok to stomp around with his new cowboy boots in a disgusting cat box that was thrown outside of the garage because it needed cleaned and no one had time to do it then it rained and froze and thawed then he had the smarts to take them off before he came into the house (thank God) but walked through the house with frozen then thawed cat shit, pee, water, and clay substance all overhisfreakinpants all the while I had no idea what the stuff on his pants was until the next freakin day.  They joined the rotten milk saturated shirt and runny baby poop stained clothes that were already piled onto the top of the dryer waiting for the nexttimeIhaveasecondtodothefreakinlaundry.

I love my life.... really, I do!

A scene from my life

First things first.  I am trying not to get anxious, but I am getting anxious!  I have had contractions since Friday 15 to 20 minutes apart pretty consistently.  Only thing is I have no pain and they keep fading or I stop paying attention because I get annoyed.  So, I'm just waiting on the pain to start.  I do go to the doc today.  I don't know what she will say since labor with Wyatt was so quick and I have had contractions for awhile now.  Anyway, I'm hoping that I am a 4 or better and that time is dwindling down.  My bag is in the car, but that was probably my curse! 

Onto business...

Last night the boys weren't tired.  I can't stand when they aren't tired at bedtime.  That means they stay up probably past midnight screwing around and are angry, whiny, little crabs in the morning.  It was 10:30 and I was ready for bed and even though they were in their beds, they weren't sleeping.  More like screaming and stealing things from each other.  Wyatt came in the living room to let me know something that happened on a show and while he was repeating the whole highly interesting story to his dad I went back and made sure Waylon didn't get out of bed.

Wyatt came back into the room...
climbed up to the top bunk with his bro...
as he was still standing he stuck his cupped hand down his jammie pants...
let a couple of juicy farts fly...
took his cupped hand out of his jammie pants...
and held it over his brother's nose demanding that Waylon smell it. 

Needless to say I have seen a bigger more manly person in our house do this before to a poor unsuspecting, yet giggling little boy and now he has passed the reigns! 

Oh, the pride I feel...
Oh, the hilarity...

(sarcasm!) but they do put a ridiculous type smile on my face as I shake my head in ironic disbelief, yet joyful thought at the reality of this being my life.

Hours before this scene Wyatt came walking through the living room with his pants down just under his butt.  Excuse me for asking what the heck he was up to and why his butt was hanging out.  He was going to take a shower.  I totally should have known this by the tone my answer was delivered in!  But, he had to throw away a dryer sheet first like there aren't a million trash cans in the house, one being in the room he just came from.  Guess who followed suit?  Poor thing couldn't get his diaper undone though so he came waddling in with his pants around his ankles asking if I could take his diaper off so he could run around like Wyatt. 

You poor nameless child, you.  You don't have a chance and I have a feeling you might be a hundred times worse!