Feelin like a women

I've stated before here about not really liking referring to myself as a "women" (see the below list of things as to why). I prefer young lady or even girl. When I was younger I would hear all these ladies (women) complain about things that were going on with their bodies. I thought I must have been the luckiest girl in the world because I didn't feel half of those things. Sure I had the occasional cramps and sore boobs, but not what they were saying!!!


And now here we are. I am 30 and things are starting to be felt or even seen. I'm feeling like a women. Let me break it down for you.

•  I feel like I am going to start my period 2 weeks or more before I am supposed to. Really?!? That is nowhere near fair!
• The cramps.
• The mood swings - OH, the mood swings!!!!
• The sore and swollen boobs that make your whole body ache.
• The normal facial hair that is now looking like a blond mustache. Thank God it isn't dark yet, but I think my waxing days are just around the corner because I can't keep up with the shaving (Just kidding, I DO NOT SHAVE my face!)
• The nice dark lip liner I am starting to develop. I really don't know what's up with that, freckles I guess? I have no freakin clue!
• Not being able to tan like I use to now I just get more stinkin freckles on my nice pasty body.
• While we are on freckles, I have a nice round spot on my cheek bone of freckles. WTH! If you are going to be freckles, look like normal freckles so people don't ask you what is wrong with your face! (note to self: time to find a good foundation and switch to washing your face every night instead of every morning)
• The crow's feet and frown laugh lines.
• The bloating.
• The constipation - thank goodness this one has only happened once and I have been pregnant three times.
• My hair changing texture.
• My body indicating to me when I am ovulating. (Why does my body seem to ovulate twice in a cycle based on this little indicator or is there something else wrong with me?)
• My posture getting worse and worse. Stand up straight for goodness sake!
• The cottage cheese no matter how much weight I lose in one particular part of my booty, er I mean body.
• The pooch in my stomach no matter how much weight I lose.
• The hard callus things on my feet.

I am sure the list could go on and on, but for right now please God, let this be all! Keep the grey hairs away for at least 10 more years pretty, pretty, pretty please!

Sorry if I grossed some of you out.