I Reluctantly Resolute

I’m a great friend. I will stand beside you through thick and thin. I will compliment you. Send you gifts when something has happened or for no reason. Send you emails just because to tell you I’m thinking about you. I will drive hours to see you. I will love your kids and keep your secrets. If you mess up, I’m there to tell you things will get better. If your self-esteem is low I will boost it with true things I love about you. I will tell you how much you mean to me. I will pray for you. I will cry with you, share your anger and your happiness. My heart will truly sink when you tell me bad news. I will hug you so tight you beg me to stop. I will even shower you if you get too drunk and puke all over yourself. I will make you my family, not just a friend. I will give you my true opinion when you ask for it and support you even if I don’t agree with you.

All of these things are so very true for the ones I love. There are times I have not been a great friend. Feelings are HUGE with me. I went through a time in my life when friends weren’t that important and I learned hard lessons about just how important they truly are. And I’ve made an effort to show those that I love just how much I care. I’m not afraid of getting hurt by friends anymore. That’s for the old insecure me. I don’t expect anything in return other than your smile, your hug… your friendship.

 

A friend of mine, one who I cherish for so many reasons, has posted lately about how we are to ourselves.

 

“In remembering to have the same love, grace, and patience for ourselves as we do for the people that mean the most to us, we might need to take a step back and see things from another angle. Chances are, if we are too hard on ourselves, it is likely that we are equally as hard on those we love most. Let’s take some pressure off in 2013… embrace a little ore grace, love and imperfection that leads to learning”

I couldn’t agree more!

 

As I vowed to start the year off right with my whole, “I don’t make resolutions” attitude I’m ready to make some. I’m ready to be a friend to myself and a friend to those that are closest to me. I put guilt behind me a long time ago. I don’t feel mommy guilt as much as I used to. Even after one of my kids downed a bottle of Children’s Tylenol. I’m not letting myself feel guilty for having that medicine on the counter because kids are kids and if determined enough they will find a way no matter what.  I learned my lesson regardless and have made adjustments.  I know I’m a good mom and I know I’m doing what is right with my family. Sometimes I’m not the best at that, but big picture, I’m doing the right things.

 

However, I tell myself that I mess up too much. Usually when I mess up there are 4 guys in my life that get the brunt of the anger and disappointment I feel with myself. My terms of messing up have to do with not being patient enough or not handling my anger appropriately. I can do it at work, in public places, but get me at home with no accountability and you will see something different. I don’t beat them… I yell. And, yelling is something that I never wanted to be a common piece of my parenthood. So, as I was thinking about this, it turns out that I just might have some resolutions I would like to work toward this year.

• Stop using yelling as your go to parenting tool.
• Meals – plan them – every week – prepare for them – and make them as healthy as can be. Incorporate more soups/crockpot stuff for really busy nights or Saturdays.
• Check-ups and appointments – Schedule them and go! Dermatologist, Dentist, Allergy, get your eyes checked THIS YEAR!!!!
• Spend 1-1 time with each of the boys – work on a plan here. Waylon likes to help cook. Let him.
• You HAVE to get better in the mornings. HAVE TO, HAVE TO, HAVE TO, have to! Fix your lunch the night before and don’t forget it. Work on making a breakfast the night before as well. Have everyone help in the kitchen the night before to allow time for morning prep.
• Give the boys more chores especially if they want game time.
• Work – FOCUS. Find your creativity again and reinsert yourself.
• Running/working out – compete in something each month once Spring hits. HAVE FUN and step back when it becomes too much. ENJOY IT!!! Ultimately I’d love to see a defined 6 pack by vacation!
• Be the kind of wife you would want to have around. Show more appreciation. TREAT him as one of your closest friends – he is your best one after all.
• Keep reading your devotionals but let them sink deeper. Take notes and add a daily prayer no matter how big or how small.
• Keep your friendships important!

Ok, so it was a lot and now I feel a little embarrassed about my hugely negative attitude toward resolutions.  I guess I just don't like the implied failure that goes along with "New Year's resolutions".  If it is important to me, I will do what it takes to make a difference no matter what time of year it is.  Maybe I will make an awesome effort at working at each one of these. Maybe I will forget I ever wrote this post, but these are the things that will be floating around in my head and hopefully next year around this time I can take a look back and see a better me. That’s the ultimate goal, the best me I can be, living the best life I can live.

 

2012 was a pretty great year for me.  In February I vowed to start living my best life. I had some pretty strong moments and I got to a point where I realized I can do it if I really want to, whatever “it” is. I set priorities and I stuck to them and I expect nothing less in 2013.

 

Thanks for the inspiration, Amanda!

 

Do you make resolutions?

Want to share any?

 

The boys wanted to share theirs:

Wyatt (6):

• Stop playing so much Spiderman
• Focus at school
• Only have 1 girlfriend
• Stop mooning my mom
• Stop peeing all over and leaving that pee pool down at the base of the toilet

Waylon (4):

• Stop inappropriately pulling my pants down
• Stop saying "balls" so much
• Cut out the cussing
• Stop peeing all over the side of the toilet
• Learn to wipe my own butt

 

Weston (23 months):

• Take it easy on the meds
• Sing more
• Say "jus a minute" more because my mom thinks it is adorable
• Stop throwing my food all over the floor when I'm done
• stop asking mommy to powder my butt every "biper" change.

Just kidding, I made them all up, but they sure are good ones.  Happy New Year! 

Christmas/New Year's/Catchup/Lots of pics

So much blogging to do, so little time.  I've already started the new year off behind.  That's ok though.  I will get to it or I won't and the world won't come to an end.

My thoughts on New Year's resolutions?  I don't care for them.  Ok, great if you have them and even better if you stick to them!  But, me?  I've never actually made them.  Sure, there are things that I need to work on and vow to do better, but I like to do that throughout the year not just on Jan 1. 

As far as goals go, I'm horrible at them.  I set them and forget them.  There have been a few that have made a lasting impact on my life though.  Becoming more debt conscience being one of the major ones.  I'm just not a goal setting kind of person.  If there are things I want to do or work on I do it, but I don't chart or write out the steps I'm going to take to get there and I'm not rigid with them.  I don't know why, it's just not how my mind works.  Maybe I would be better off if I set them and actively tracked them.  Anyway, this year the things I want to work on are:

1.  Being nicer to Dale. 
2.  Being more patient in every area.

Not exactly specific and hard to measure.  The end. 

Onto some pictures to try to catch up a smidgen. I have taken about 350 pictures in the last few weeks so narrowing it down was a bit difficult.


So here we go...

We went to Crown Center for a day with the boys.  There's just something magical about this place at Christmas time. 

I tried to get another great shot in the train like a few years back, but taking pictures of these punks is impossible these days.  Waylon refused to look. 

This is the best one of the 3 of them I could get.

So close.  Nice face, Waylon!

We made cookies on Christmas Eve after an awesome Chief's game experience.  That deserves a post of its own.  I will post it soon, maybe.

There were lots of sprinkles and lots of mess, but I tried to let them just be.

More of an attempt to capture the best of my angels.

Poor Weston!  He just wanted to go to bed.

I ate most of those chocolate chip cookies. 

Our letter Santa left before I could stuff down the last cookie!

I think Santa got our boys mixed up with someone else's.  I know they weren't THIS good. 

Christmas #2 with Grandma.  

So glad I got this expression.  He talked about that DS for WEEKS maybe even MONTHS!  He was so happy.

He gave Grandma Vada a huge hug after receiving his cash.  At least there are little glimpses of us raising him right.

Playing with Aunt Ronda

Practicing walking.  He's partly walking now, by the way.  I can't believe how big he is getting. 

Christmas #3 at my parent's.  And this is my classy sister.

Crazy Will.

Butt Crack Waylon

Giggly Wyatt

My sister beating up our dad.

I don't even know.

We lost Weston (It gets hot in my parent's house, btw.  Hence all the shirtless boys.)

Then we found him.

The boy's first camp out at Nae Nae and Pa Pa's.

And Christmas was over.

Their new (new to them) Gator.

It's a tie between who loves it more, Weston or Waylon.

We had some TX company.

Waylon had a date.

So cute...

Then Wyatt stepped in on his girl.

Then they decided Bros before hoes.  (Totally kidding, Sarah)

My no longer such a baby, baby.

It was a great Christmas break where we hardly sat down and had lots of time together.  The end to the holiday season didn't actually trigger a little depression for me this year.  I handled it quite well and don't feel any sadness for it being over.  That's a change.  Usually I get pretty down about taking the tree down and calling it done.  I guess we were too busy to let my head go there.

Dale cleaned out the garage and the basement.  I cleaned out the closets and the pantry.  Then we took a day and painted the livingroom, entry way, and hallway by the laundry.  Then we put the house back together.  Pictures to follow some time soon as well, maybe.  We were exhausted and the week went by too fast.  I'm thankful for it and I'm thankful for starting a new year with kind of a fresh start.  We are certainly blessed.  Merry Christmas and Happy New Year everybody!  Next big event?  Weston's 1st birthday.  Cue the tears!