When I grow up

"What do you want to do when you grow up"

"A teacher"

"A Veternarian"

"Ew, a business woman who wears those sexy black pencil skirts and tucked in, crisp, button up shirts, and high heels"

"A Policewoman"

"A mom"

Truth is as a kid my go-to answer was always a teacher.  And if I was talking to my grandma it was a Veternarian because one time I told her I wanted to be a Veternarian and it stuck with her.  One time she answered the question for me when someone asked, "oh, my girl's gonna be a Veternarian.  And she will too because once this girl says something she sticks to it.  She's a woman of her word."  So, there you have it, anytime my grandma was around that was my answer.  Isn't it funny the things that stick with you?  That had to be at least twenty years ago.  (I just realized that typing 20 years ago actually puts me back around my teens.  I was going for like, 10 years old.)

I got in high school when that question really started to matter and my grandma was no longer with us.  I freaked out a little as the date on which this important decision in my life had to be made got closer and closer. 

"I don't know if I want to be a teacher. School sucks!"

 Being a Vet was good until I realized you had to take care of ALL animals not just cute little cats and dogs and occasionally horses.  I would have to touch snakes and pigs and birth cows.  Plus watching a horse "make" a baby with another horse? Vomit worthy.  Watching the same horse give birth a few months down the road?  Vomit worthy and extremely sad, she lost her colt.  Plus, all that school.

A Policewoman?  Totally cool and I would always be in shape and know every one's dirty business, but the hours weren't for me. 

In a mall on some trip I was on, maybe state track, I passed an expensive clothing store and I said to myself, "that's it.  Someday.  Someday I will be successful, make my own money and plenty of it.  Someday I will be able to afford and wear these clothes."  So that's what did it, I was going to major in Business.  I don't think I ever told anyone that was my final deciding point at least it's the one I remember.

I don't regret the decision.  I enjoy what I do (I work at a Life Insurance company - it's important, if you don't have some get some and I don't even work in sales).  And those clothes?  I'm still cheap as hell.  And they keep it too damn cold in these buildings for sexy pencil skirts and crisp tucked in button up shirts.  So here I am, the arguably successful business woman hopefully on my way to making the money I want to make some day and making a difference in this world in my own little way.

But a mom?  That has been my lifetime dream and it is here, living, breathing, thriving.  I'm in the midst of my dream.  It's playing out right before my eyes.  That dream?  I was only shown the highlights.  Taking my kids around with me.  Person after countless person telling me what a beautiful and well behaved family I have.  Tickling, cuddling, hugging, and kissing day after day.  The time went by slow and there were always smiles and batted eyelashes.  Those are the things my dreams were filled with. 

But the real stuff?

It all makes for great stories and laughs in between.  You know, once the stress of it all has time to settle.