Tuesday, January 19, 2010

Stewing Without Doing

That's what I have been doing, or not doing, I don't know, I'm confused! My brain and patience are fried by this point. Last night was one of those "I wish I could redo" nights. It started off great. Dale was off work, picked the boys up, planned and fixed dinner. I was greeted at the door with excitement and a huge hug. All such wonderfully great things. Then we got to talking about what to do about our situation again over dinner, you know the broken down car, and it instantly changed my good mood to bad and I ended up treating Dale like crap for the rest of the night.
As you know I have been reading the Total Money Makeover book and I am really trying to get myself geared up to do this with the intensity it needs. Yesterday I created a budget finally and went backwards a couple of months to get a good baseline. I don't know how we make it with what we have now. So, that already had me stressed to the max. My feelings were that I was going to forget I ever read that book and go back to doing what I was doing because I was paying extra on things, my car was working, I was being left alone (kind of ashamed to say that one) and things were working and more importantly I wasn't so stressed about money. What I mean is I read about emergencies and him telling me they will happen and before we can even officially get started I get one thrown into my lap, well, two.
I know that is sinful thinking and the devil winning within me, so I didn't cave. I know the right thing to do is fix the transmission in my car and sell the Tahoe or Dale's truck, which we are in the process of doing. But, my mind and Dale also believe it is time for a new vehicle. If I want to follow this plan, that isn't the right answer! So, I have been worrying (stewing without doing) about the situation way too much and my stress level is getting too high AND I am taking it all out on Dale.
This morning I got my daily devotional email from The Purpose Driven Life and was again put in my place. Why am I not praying for this situation? Why do I, again, feel like it is completely up to me to make the call and worry? It's not and I need to kick my "I can do it all" attitude to the curb once again and give it up to God and be thankful. I am thankful. A lot of people that are in our situation don't have help or a back up plan or can even afford it.
So, I got my stuff together, said a little prayer, relaxed my shoulders, finished my budget, made a meal plan for 5 weeks and a grocery list. I guess I am now doing!!! And I guess I will be doing some making up with my husband.

On another note that was half the reason of being in this mess, I caught Oprah last night before bed. She was having a show about distracted driving and the impacts. How thankful I am that my little situation didn't impact others like I heard on her show. I am vowing to stay focused, not pick up my phone unless it is an absolute emergency, and attend to the road that carries so much precious cargo. How so many worlds can be ripped apart with a split second distraction. It seems so minor to pick up your phone and chat on your way home to get things done, but it isn't worth what could happen. I hope you all that read this will take that into consideration and if you need an eye opener, look up her website and take a look at the show. I'm not a huge Oprah fan, but she has a great point here. Put down your phone, stop texting, or reading things on the internet, and stay focused. You can even take my little lesson learned as an example.

If any of you have any advice or want to share your story about your struggles along the way with your Total Money Makeover, please let me know by emailing me or in the comments section. I would love to hear what you have to say.

1 comment:

  1. Victor and I have been on the "Ramsey Train" for a year this month. While it was hard to make and stick to the budget at first, it really is a rewarding feeling to see that YOU CAN DO IT! We had a large amount of debt in the way of our adoption loan/credit card from the trip to Vietnam, but we see light at the end of the tunnel. In July we will be DEBT FREE (except the house, of course!) You can do it, girlie! Seriously, it alleviated so much stress for me, and opened up communication about money between me and Victor, and that right there, is a definite WIN! Love you!



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