Monday, April 1, 2013

There was good and there was ugly

Last week was my 1st full week of heavy training 4 consecutive days instead of just Monday’s. It was also the beginning of my ridiculously long 2 ½ week PMS cycle. I feel gross, to put it out there honestly. My skin cannot get any paler. Up to this point it hasn’t bothered me much, but the more I wear workout clothes at a public gym, the worse I feel about catching a glimpse of myself in the mirror. Plus, all that great bloating has caused anything resembling strength in my stomach to go into hiding like my kids and husband should be doing. The one thing that hasn’t been too bad just yet (which will become uncontrollable once I post this) is the chocolate craving.

5 boys 6 and under - loud, crazy, and physical

Mom and Waylon - Easter party

Thursday was busy with Easter parties, preparing for company, and more parties. At least the weather was nice. We enjoyed our company as we always do and once they left the ugly in my 2 year old matched with the ugly in my emotional control and hit the freakin fan and there WAS poop. Everything I cleaned was turned upside down once I left the room. Everything I picked up was drug outside of the toybox a third time. Every smell I cleaned up I would walk into a room with a different one. Every cookie crumb swept there were 40 dropped. When I kicked him outside he came back in with a leg dripping with blood and minus pants, shoes, and socks. When I bathed him for the 2nd time that afternoon he found one more puddle in the shoes that we managed to keep dry and clean. I had HAD it. And I took it out (completely inappropriately) on the ones that didn’t deserve it.

Wyatt and the girl that wouldn't leave his side - Easter party

Couple that with the 2 year anniversary of my father-in-law’s passing, a day of family Easter celebrations to prepare for, and just the thought of the last 4 years of having a funeral to attend in the month of March was making me mark a red X through it for the rest of my life. I didn’t realize all of this until I actually tried to figure out just what my problem was. I guess I put my finger on it. But, it isn’t an excuse. Just because the month of March seems to be dooms month doesn’t mean that I can find a cave to curl up in the fetal position in. Although, that might have been better than lashing out at everyone.

The 2 year old PUNK!  Because he is so stinkin cute his life is spared.

I have grace. I have forgiveness. I have a savior. And for that, I’m extremely thankful and get to pick my feet up stronger and MARCH into April with my shoulders back. Mainly because I have to start posing practicing, but why not use it as a reason to keep my head up?

As I mentioned above, I have changed up my workouts a bit. I made a decision that if I’m going for this stage thing, I might as well get serious about it. If you know much about having an athletic body you may know that a cardio queen looks much different than a gym rat. You have muscle in both, but the composition is different. So, since there are half marathons around all the time, I thought I might loosen up on my half goal and train for the stage. It doesn’t mean I’m not going to run it. It means I’m not going to run it as hard or as fast as I had hoped when I signed up for the thing. There is nothing wrong with that. I can’t expect myself to get up there and compete with these girls with logging tons of miles each week. So, I’m working out M-Th over my lunch break (which means less blogging but check my 5 Sharp Lives Facebook page.  I'm trying to update that more). And running Saturday (short/faster day) and Sunday (long runs) as the schedule calls. If I never break 8 minute miles before July, I’m ok with that. I truly am. I just need to make sure I’m doing it smart and I don’t end up injured because I’m pretty sure crutches or a limp on stage won’t score well. If I feel fueled enough to get in another running workout during the week, I will, but I’m not going to push it. Plus, the boys start baseball practice this week, both twice a week, so getting more workout time is going to be extremely tricky.

So far my progress has been slow. I feel strong and mostly sore. My thighs, especially the back, are starting to really shape up, which is where I probably needed the most work. I also have some tummy stuff to do and I figure out how to control my diet to prevent so much bloating.  The eating healthy thing is going better thanks to many who have chimed in on Facebook to help this piece that I need so much help with.  We won't mention the weekend though, ok?  If if wasn't for the holiday I would have been ok.  I tried to fit in healthier meals and tried to make healthier decisions, but the Pizza Ranch is something I should stay far, far away from. 


I failed to do my 1st 5k race report as well last week.  Here's the skinny:
Mile 1 - Ran with 2 best high school girlfriends
Mile 2 - Ran with 2 best high school girlfriends and was amazed how strong Christen was holding on.  I was so stinkin proud of her.  This was her 1st 5k ever
Mile 3 stretched it out.  Enjoyed a nice downhill and coasted in.  It felt pretty darn good until I stopped and immediately froze.  This kind of "racing" is truly my favorite. This is what will keep me enjoying the run instead of hating it and buring out. 
I'm so beyond excited that many of my friends in life are realizing running and health and it makes it so much easier to continue on this journey.  Plus, extra girl time!!!
Me, Cherryh, Christen

Here's to no excuses for the next 8 weeks of buckling down and getting really serious about what is to come as long as I can stay sane and my husband agrees to stay around me.  If you can make it to the show I would love to have you there.  I have a group of girls that are planning on making it and some other really good friends coming as well.  I'm going to need all of your spirit to keep me on those heels and not taking the chicken exit!!!!  May 25th at the Midland in KC.


  1. I'm so impressed by your dedication! And wow, do you look amazing! :)

    I'm sorry March has been a rough month for you for the last few years. At least we're into April now!

  2. You are so hard on yourself friend. You're accomplishing way more than a lot of people, including me who just pounded back a cheesecake...and sweat just reading this.
    I'm really sorry that March is a awful time for you. i hope that you are able to take comfort in the memories you created :)
    PS. It's April now.

  3. Tayarra, I have loved following you on FB and seeing your progress. You are so dedicated!! The pic of your shoulders today was amazing. Wow! I can't wait to see how much you will have changed between your "before" and "after" pictures. You look amazing now and yet I know you will be so much stronger in a short time.

    Sounds like March is a hard month for good thing it is over! Good luck with your eating and training but don't forget to be good to yourself, too! :) xo



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