7 x 400’s on the track at 1:21. I can do 200’s all day. Throw a 400 in there and I feel like crying. This used to be my race. This used to be the one I could dig down and dominate. Eating up the corners and striding with strength on the back stretch. It would feel so good to come around that last corner to the home stretch. To push with everything I had to get to that finish line. The burn my butt and hamstrings would feel… I used to love it.
I kind of wished it was storming when my alarm went off. Just one little bolt of lightning? Nothing. It was so hot in the house I felt like crying again. I refuse to turn the AC on for 3 days. Refuse!! I got my stuff on and headed to the car anyway. I don’t remember the last time I was so negative about a workout. I seriously had thoughts of saying screw all of this.
Two warm up laps around the dark, lonely track. I could have only done one. It was so warm and muggy. There was a nice strong south wind on the back stretch. It is always windy at our track no matter what. I was trying to think of the best place to start. I needed to decide if I wanted the wind in my face at the beginning or if I wanted to fight it at the end. I just tried to tell myself that I have to run the entire track so it really doesn’t matter where I start and to just go already.
1:20 – This one felt so good. Felt like the old days. Maybe I can do this. 6 more…
1:24 – died at the 200 mark
1:27 – holy crap
1:28 – geeeeezzzzzzeeeee!
1:30 – seriously?
Oops! After I didn’t reach my goal in my last 5k I decided that I was going to stick to my plan 100% for the next 5 weeks to reach my goal for my last race of the season in mid Nov. I have been doing well, but I feel so tired. My legs are sore, heavy, tired. My body is tired and weak. I feel like I need more rest days. But, I’m determined to stick to it. Until today that is. I felt like crap. I was running out of time because all the time I used to try to talk myself out of the workout and I needed to decide to quit at 5 or push out 2 more. I felt that my times were just going to keep getting worse even though I switched up where I started and where I fought the wind. So pushing out 2 more wasn’t going to do me any good. I tried to tell myself that each one makes me stronger and to keep pushing. I told myself that I was going to push even if they sucked. I was done. I didn’t have anything left.
About that time the smoking jogger arrived (have I told you all about him?) and I didn’t need an audience during my death, so I called it. I walked a lap, stretched out and went home. I quit. I don’t want to start hating this. This is something I do for me. I’m supposed to enjoy this and I don’t want that to change. I felt like today could/almost did change that. I feel like a wuss.
My workouts lately have been good, but frustrating. Saturday I had to squeeze in 5m fast before dinner and it was turning dark. Our town is much livelier at this hour than my usual hour.
Saturday: 5.20 miles - 41:19 - 7:56 avg
Mile 1 7:30
Mile 2 7:59
Mile 3 9:02 – wth?
Mile 4 7:59
Mile 5 7:17
An example of one of the hills on the hilly 4. Beautiful - yes! Nice - NO! There is a nice long gradual one right after this one.
Sunday: 58:24 minutes - 7.39 miles - 7:54 avg
Mile 1 8:56
Mile 2 7:39
Mile 3 7:06
Mile 4 6:36
Mile 5 8:36
Mile 6 4:55
Mile 7 11:49
I’m pretty sure I did not run a 4:55 at mile 6 or ever in my life! At the end of mile 6 I was dying trying to dig up that last hill. I think my GPS had a hard time adjusting because I pushed mile 7 fast to keep my average in the 7's.
Monday – My usual 3 miles. I accidentally paused my workout for some stupid reason, so mile 2 is a guess. Anyway it was about an 8 minute average which is completely frustrating giving the fact that I have a faster pace in longer runs than I do in my shorter, supposed to be faster, runs. What the heck is going on here?! This is what makes my mind want to quit. This is what makes me say, screw racing I will just go out and run comfortably. So frustrating! So, I’m having a down training week. Hopefully next week will be better. Or maybe tomorrow’s weight day will help get back some motivation. One can only hope.
In other news, we did family pictures on Sunday – country and cute – will show you some soon. Weston DID NOT cooperate and that is why I have no professional pictures of him since he was weeks old. WEEKS OLD!!! He turns 2 in January. See that picture of him down there to the right? Yeah, that is totally him. And I put up a new valance in the kitchen! Wyatt’s on the left, Waylon’s on the right. I’m going to pick their favs every week and display them here. What do you all do with your pride and joy’s work?
Have you experienced this frustration in your training?
What do you do to try to get yourself back on the horse?
Do you run with your phone using an app or do you have a GPS watch?
Do the watches have the same issues my app seems to have?