Wednesday, July 18, 2012

Drama

Funny how drama will drag you down.

Pull you away from your goals in life.
Away from the person you want to be.
It is part of our human nature to get a little kick out of some good ole family drama from time to time.
It takes a really disciplined person to not be sucked into its ever swirling, powerful force.

I’m going to be vague enough to be classy, but detailed enough to shine some light.

I form my own opinions. I see things with my own eyes. I give people the benefit of the doubt even when I have been warned. Yes, I proceed a little more cautious if that is the case, but I give them the chance I feel we all deserve nonetheless. In the meantime, I keep that informative little nugget in my back pocket as my last defense before I really get it up the ass from that person. Pun definitely intended.

Although I have yet to realize an opposite truth when warned in such a situation I still feel it is important to give people a little and see what they do with it. I find you can really discover a lot of character in these types of situations.

I am not na├»ve. I am a strong woman. I am smart both book wise and street wise. I read people rather well. I’m hardly shocked by other’s reactions coming from left field. There are always signs. ALWAYS! You just have to be observant enough to see them for yourself.

I am NOT a psychiatrist, nor do I claim to diagnose people based on my opinions. I will however tell you what you are acting like if you ask me directly.

My relationships with other people are measured by trust, respect, and love. If one or multiple items in that list were upset I turn off the spigot and it takes a LONG time to get it dripping again if it ever does. That’s me and that’s how I have guarded my heart. Some of it was a lot easier than others. It doesn’t happen often, but when it does it is a solid wall for me. I do my best to forgive as a Christian should forgive, but I am also human and I’m going to fall from time to time.

Our family is not short on the family drama. Some of us choose to have a bit more class and deal with family issues in the walls of our family and not blasted all over different forms of social media, as great of a show as that provides for others, some of us have tried to keep our senses about us. As much as I want to stand up on a mountain top (facebook) and shout the truths to miles and miles (hundreds and hundreds of friends and hope they share and like it, maybe even comment on it) I’m not going to go there. Because again, it is family. Family, which is supposed to mean something and be the furthest from your enemies, but sadly too often than not, some family members become our biggest enemies, people get caught in the middle, and families get ripped apart.

The “friends” seeing these posts don’t bother me. The ones that matter know the truth. They don’t need this goo seeping into their cracks and muddling all the truth they know or causing them to feel pity for the rough time the family is dealing with. They don’t need to be drug along sometimes being put in the middle. The only thing they are trying to do is get validation for their inappropriate actions, leave out very important pieces of the facts, and hurt others by trying so desperately to get the others at the core that they trip up on themselves making an even bigger mess. It is learned human behavior to want to jump on and give people one of their biggest tongue lashings ever and really show them up to their “friends” when these half-truths pop up from time to time to set the record straight.

But why? What is it going to do other than cause people to refresh their page over and over and over again (there is a reason World’s Deadliest Accidents is so popular) grasping for the next bit of drama to be dished out? While the family is in shambles, some embarrassed, some wanting to climb under rocks no matter the amount of snakes that lie under, some with no regard to the damage they are doing and how far out it is going, some not giving a damn. Our celebrations as a family are fewer and farther between. People can’t grow up and act their ages, get their stuff together, and pay for what is theirs, mend to what they own, respect their elders, do nothing but make a product of themselves, grasp for the easy buck at all costs, take the shortcuts, all the while playing the victim and crying “poor me!”

There are times I think it is beyond repair. Time to cut our losses and focus on way more important items in our lives. We’ve tried. Tried to forgive, tried to help, and tried to talk it out, reason with, change the behavior. When is enough enough? Some say we have gone way too far. We will protect our immediate family and the ones we are responsible for and move on.

Just keep in mind, you never know the whole story and crap like this, families being torn apart, doesn’t belong on facebook like some Jerry Springer episode – arrests, torn clothing, missing teeth, stringy hair, wife beaters, random people strewn about and all.

3 comments:

  1. Oh friend...
    I hope that everything is ok.
    I don't know what happened but I can completely relate.
    I have not spoken to my sister in law for 4 years over a silly status I wrote "I'm looking for a new dentist. Any suggestions? Adios XYZ dental"....and she freaked out and blasted me on facebook...passive aggressive. She worked at the office and said that I was slamming her and attacking her. I apologized and yet she continued.
    She refuses to let her kids and her husband attend any celebration of my sons. They've never celebrated his birthday.
    Even worse, this whole thing has effected Shawn and his brother's relationship.
    I've tried so hard...but gave up.
    Sigh....
    Sorry for the long winded comment. I don't know what you're going through...but I kind of do.

    ReplyDelete
  2. Families can definitely be complicated! Prayers that you will find peace...whatever your decisions!
    Michelle
    http://normalchaosforamultitaskmom.blogspot.com/2012/07/the-beauty-of-rose.html

    ReplyDelete
  3. No one ever knows the full story so they shouldn't judge.

    I have a really hard time letting things go when I've been hurt. I can forgive and let go of the anger, but it's near impossible for me to trust again.

    ReplyDelete

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